by Mandy Ochoa

In some ways, we want our children to grow up to be “chips off the old block.” Sometimes, we want them to do as we say, not as we do. Sleeping well is among the latter for many of us, in a nation where lost productivity, obesity, vehicular crashes and depression are byproducts of lives that are too busy or stressful for a good night’s rest.

You read about how adults are suffering from over-taxed schedules, housework and cooking, addiction to computers, Blackberries and television shows. Now we need baby Palm Pilots to keep up with our children’s schedules full of school, church, sports and social activities. And that doesn’t include day-to-day homework and special school projects or tests that have many youngsters burning the midnight oil.

The experts have plenty to say about kids and sleep, and we’ll get to that. But some moms tell ourselves we’re not the only ones who don’t always follow expert advice to the letter. We ventured into the Real World to get bedtime stories.

Babette and Mike Smith of Fortson are among those who haven’t followed a strict sleeping schedule with son Ryan, 7, who makes straight A’s, takes karate, has tried soccer and has studied Spanish since he was 2 years old. He loves Pokemon and playing with friends.

“Mike and I never had a bedtime for Ry, except now that he’s going to school. We never felt structure worked for us,” said Babette Smith, adding, “I never wanted to be the parent that couldn’t go out for lunch or dinner, or shopping with friends because my kid was taking a nap or had to be in bed. Ry would literally fall asleep at a restaurant — so we actually could have adult conversation because he’d be asleep in the stroller or the booth.”

The flexibility from the beginning has served the Smiths well. Even today, says Ryan’s mom, “if we eat late or don’t get home until late, he’s like, ‘Whatever.’”

Joseph and Krista Kostuch of Cataula are good friends of the Smiths, so they obviously have many things in common. Their children’s sleep schedules aren’t among them.

Krista Kostuch describes the nightly bedtime routine for Kate Marie, 5, and Caroline, 3 years old. “We have a little routine. At 7:30, they get in the bathtub. When they get out, they brush their teeth, we read them a book, and they go to bed,” she said, adding that they’re in bed by 8-8:30 p.m. She refers to the routine as “bath, brush, book and bed,” and they’ve pretty much always followed it, with obvious modifications as the girls grew from infancy.

They are not as strict with the bedtime schedule on weekends, and they can tell the girls are tired the next day. The Kostuch girls have been “good sleepers” since they were babies, their mother says.

Well, we’ve heard from two moms, or hands-on experts. What do pediatricians say about sleep? According to the docs who write for www.Kidshealth.org, the largest and most visited doctor-approved site providing health information for kids: “Most kids between 5 and 12 get about 9.5 hours a night, but experts agree that most need 10 or 11 hours each night. Sleep is an individual thing and some kids need more than others.”

Speaking directly to school-age children, Dr. Michael Goodman writes, “When your body doesn’t have enough hours to rest, you may feel tired or cranky, or you may be unable to think clearly. You might have a hard time following directions, or you might have an argument with a friend over something really stupid. A school assignment that’s normally easy may feel impossible, or you may feel clumsy playing your favorite sport or instrument.

One more reason to get enough sleep: If you don’t, you may not grow as well. That’s right, researchers believe too little sleep can affect growth and your immune system, which keeps you from getting sick.”

This website is among several helpful links endorsed on Columbus practice Rivertown Pediatrics’ site, www.rivertownpediatrics.com.

The experts further agree that sleep isn’t just for babies, but try imposing a schedule on your teenagers! The Web article by Dr. Elana Pearl Ben-Joseph tells us: “Most teens don’t get enough sleep, but that’s usually because they’re overloaded and tend to skimp on sleep. But sleep problems can keep some teens awake at night even when they want to sleep. People with a sleep ?deficit are unable to concentrate, study and work effectively. They can also experience emotional problems, like depression.

“Research shows that teens need 8 1/2 to more than 9 hours of sleep a night. You don’t need to be a math whiz to figure out that if you wake up for school at 6:00 a.m., it means you have to go to bed at 9:00 p.m. to reach the 9-hour mark. Studies have found that many teens have trouble falling asleep that early, though. It’s not because they don’t want to sleep. It’s because their brains naturally work on later schedules and aren’t ready for bed.”

So, what’s a parent to do, other than set rigid bedtimes and go nuts trying to enforce them? Although this particular set of tips was written for pre-schoolers, most of the basics are on lists you see for all ages, including Mom and Dad:

• Include a winding-down period during the half hour before bedtime.
• Stick to a bedtime, alerting your child both half an hour and 10 minutes beforehand.
• Set fixed times for going to bed, waking up and taking naps.
• Keep consistent playtimes and mealtimes.
• Avoid stimulants, such as caffeine, near bedtime.
• Make the bedroom quiet, cozy and conducive to sleeping.
• Use the bed only for sleeping — not for playing or watching TV.
• Limit food and drink before bedtime.
• Allow your child to choose which pajamas to wear, which stuffed animal to take to bed, etc.
• Consider playing soft, soothing music.
• Tuck your child into bed snugly for a feeling of security.

Kind of makes you want to eat some Graham crackers and curl up with your blankie. Sweet dreams.