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by Calista Sprague

We have all been there. You are trying to cook lunch, find a repairperson to fix the dryer and your toddler is screaming because she needs something, but you have no idea what. How many times has a mother thrown up her hands, crying out in exasperation,“I wish you could talk!”?

Toddlers comprehend so much. They understand an astonishing number of words and concepts, but speech lags far behind. In place of speaking, pointing and grunting or screeching often suffice. Parents become fairly adept at translating this primitive communication to give their children what they need. But sometimes the toddler’s desire is woefully unclear, while his dissatisfaction is all too clear. Often parent and child will simultaneously melt down out of sheer frustration at the communication gap. The so-called “terrible twos,” which seem to set in at around 15-18 months, may have less to do with behavior problems and more to do with this communication frustration.

The good news is today’s parents have an alternative. A language bridge has been discovered to span the gap between a child’s knowing and articulating. In the late 1980s Joseph Garcia, then a graduate student, completed his thesis research which showed that hearing babies exposed to American Sign Language (ASL) at 6 to 7 months of age began to communicate through signing by 8 to 9 months. Garcia became interested in this phenomenon after he noticed that deaf children were able to communicate in sign with their parents far earlier than hearing children were able to speak. In recent years many follow-up studies have been conducted, upholding Garcia’s findings.

Formal research was soon followed by an onslaught of videos and books to help parents learn to talk to their babies through sign language. You may consider this just another over-the-top, out-doing-the- Jones’s, extreme parenting practice—think “Meet the Fockers.” But Reggie Foster, former Sunny 100 DJ, thinks it just makes sense and uses ASL signs with her 14- month-old daughter Marlee. Foster recommends signing “simply because it allows your child to communicate with you. And it eliminates a lot of the frustrations and the temper tantrums because they know what they want, but they can’t tell you.”

Speech requires highly complex patterns of fine motor control that many babies don’t master until sometime after the age of two, whereas sign language uses more gross motor skills, so babies are capable of basic signing at a much earlier age. ASL can be used as a tool to allow your toddler to “say” what they know but are unable to articulate, helping cut down on frustration levels for both parent and child.

Using a few signs she found in the back of the book, “Babywise,” Foster began signing with Marlee at 10 months. “It took about a month before she signed back to me. It was amazing, just one day she started doing ‘more.’ That was the first sign she did. And then they just came one right after the other: more, eat, please. It was amazing how quickly she started using them.”

Foster suggests focusing on only a few signs and using them regularly. “I wouldn’t try to do a lot of signs with Marlee. I would just do one or two things, and I was just very consistent about always signing, for example, ‘eat’ before we would eat or ‘please,’ and she just started doing it.”

In addition to the myriad of programs available through books and videos, Valley parents can take advantage of live classes taught by local instructors who have used ASL with their own children. CSU’s Continuing Education offers a class calledCommunicating with Your Baby and also offers a Kindermusik class called Sign and Sing.

Communicating with Your Baby, like many sign language programs, presents the use of ASL signs for early communication with children ages 6 months to 3 years. Up to two caregivers per child can attend, so a parent and grandparent, nanny or babysitter could also be included in the process. According to Anne Marie Bills, program support manager for the Rankin Arts Center, the children and their parents learn signs for basic objects and concepts that they encounter every day. Bills says that the class also encourages parents to build on the bond that already exists with their child, modifying the vocabulary to fit their unique daily routine.

Parents and babies learn ASL signs in the Sign and Sing class as well, but music activities are used to facilitate the learning. “The integration of music helps make signing a little less intimidating,” says instructor Vanessa Talbott. “It also teaches the parents that they don’t need to sign all the time, focusing instead on those opportunities when the child is primed and ready to learn.” The music and novelty toys used during the activities peak the children’s interest and help draw them into that primed state.

Talbott gave an example of a typical activity involving the signs for “bubbles” and “more.” “I had a bubble machine, and we sang a song about bubbles and signed ‘bubbles’ while we were singing,” Talbott explained. “Then I would turn off the bubble machine and wait for all the bubbles to be gone. That’s when you make eye contact with the child and ask them, ‘Do you want more bubbles?’ And it’s for them to learn, ‘If I sign ‘bubbles,’ or if I sign ‘more,’ then I’m going to get more bubbles.’”

Capturing a child’s desire to communicate is the key to teaching the signs effectively, according to Talbott. Rather than simply teaching parents a list of signs, she demonstrates how to integrate sign language into their day-to-day activities. Sign and Sing focuses on two categories of signs. “One is called See a Lot, Do a Lot Signs that occur throughout a child’s day, signs like: eat, milk, bed and bath. And then we use Highly Motivating Signs that if they really want something, the child would be more apt to sign, like: apple, baby, bear, car, mommy, daddy,” Talbott said.

Michelle Moore incorporates sign language into daily life with 20-month-old son Tyler. “At around 6 months we actually introduced signing with a children’s DVD through Discovery Toys,” she said. Later, when Tyler was 18-months-old, Moore signed up for Sign and Sing, hoping to add additional signs to the 10 they learned from the DVD. “We were able to expand our vocabulary,” she said. “Vanessa was very helpful. It may not have been part of the class vocabulary, but she was able to look up words that we needed to work on at this particular stage. We introduced a few more at a time, and we’re now up to 20 words that he says while signing.”

Besides teaching parents the signs and how to create opportunities for signing with their children, Talbott also educates parents on recognizing their baby’s signing attempts. “There are lots of different curricula that will change the signs to make them more ‘baby friendly,’ but what [researchers] found is that a child, regardless of what sign you give them, will give you their version back,” she said. “For instance any kind of sign that’s done on the face, like mommy is an open hand with the thumb at the chin, a child will typically sign on a different part of the head, or they may sign over their shoulder. It’s teaching the parents to learn to identify and encourage whatever attempts at communication their child is trying to give them.”

Skeptics worry that a child will substitute signs for speech, delaying verbal development, but research shows just the opposite. Several studies suggest that babies who sign at an early age actually develop verbal communication earlier than non-signers. Parents usually speak the words as they sign, so the children actually hear more clear, consistent examples of key words than if the parents were not signing. As the children’s articulation develops, the sounds are already ingrained, accelerating speech acquisition.

Dr. Michelle Anthony and Dr. Reyna Lindert, both holding Ph.D.s from the University of California at Berkeley, created Signing Smart, the program used in the Sign and Sing classes. They have studied signing with babies extensively and have found that the average 18-month-old can speak 10 to 50 words whereas the average child using Signing Smart can sign 79 words and speak 105.

Even if your child has already begun speaking, signing may be beneficial. Anyone who has spent time with a toddler knows that pronunciation of first words is far less than perfect. Even after speech begins to develop, interpretation of these awkward attempts can be almost as frustrating as the grunts and points of months past.

“Sometimes it’s hard to understand, so a sign to go along with what Tyler is saying has helped me recognize what he’s trying to tell me,” Moore said.

But signing comes with benefits beyond early speech or avoidance of frustration. Signing recently helped Moore diagnosis her son’s illness. “Tyler had an ear infection, and thanks to the signing I knew his ear was hurting him,” Moore said. She was able to get him to the doctor and treated sooner.

Bills relayed a story often told by an instructor in the Communicating with Your Baby class. A toddler, strapped in his car seat in the back of the vehicle, began to cry loudly. The mother could see nothing wrong, but the child did a sign for “flying” so she looked around, finding a wasp in the car. Without the sign, the mother would most likely have looked for a pinching seat belt and simply dismissed his crying as an unwarranted fit. In this case, however, she quickly pulled the car over and got rid of the wasp.

Talbott enjoys seeing the children begin to sign in her classes. “It’s really neat to see the signs develop even just for the short five week class,” she said. “Then what’s great,” Talbott added, “when they have learned to sign and then they learn to speak, they will use both the sign and word and then eventually phase out the sign all together.”

CSU has added a second section of Sign and Sing that allows parents and their children to explore ASL further. Moore and her son have already registered. “We always look forward to upcoming classes.” She appreciates the enhanced communication with her young son, saying, “We use the signs every day!”