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Chasing the
Elusive... |
by Rachel Crumbley
Congratulations! You are expecting a baby. Have you heard “the” secret? The secret that can boost your energy level and help you think clearer, allowing you to better handle whatever comes your way. Have no fear. The secret is hopefully within your reach—SLEEP.
Okay, maybe it isn’t a secret. You probably have already heard about the importance of sleep for new moms through the advice of family and friends or the lady at the grocery store—“You better sleep when that baby sleeps.” That is definitely one piece of advice you should take from both doctors and experienced mothers.
Before the Baby Arrives
You have no idea how long or how hard your labor will be. Just like preparing for a marathon, rest will help prepare your body for the impending labor, delivery and recovery.
In the Hospital
You are in labor but the doctors and nurses tell you to rest. Do it. You are hooked up to all types of monitoring machines. If the professionals can predict that your baby has taken a quick siesta, get some sleep.
Post-Delivery
You are surrounded by baby professionals. Take advantage of it. Once you get home, you will wonder how you got there without having to take some life-skills certification. (They make you get a license just to drive a car!) Cuddle and coo, and of course, nurse when appropriate, but if given the opportunity to get some sleep—sleep. It won’t be long until you and your spouse are on your own 24 hours a day, and you will be amazed how long a day can feel when you have no rest.
You Are Both at Home…
What now?
At first you are simply healing and taking care of the baby. After the initial settling in, new moms will start typical household duties as well as writing thank you notes, sending announcements, hosting guests wanting to see the new baby. Slow down. It will all happen (hopefully by someone else). Remember, your body has just worked really hard to create a miracle that is now completely dependent on YOU. Proper rest will help the body heal as well as provide some mental clarity to get through the day.
We adults have two things going for us that allow us to sleep our necessary eight hours per night. The first are stomachs and bladders large enough to hold their appropriate contents during the night. The second is that our body clocks are set to sleep when it gets dark and stay asleep. Babies have neither, and this is what will wake you at hours that people should never read on a clock…the hours between 1 and 4 a.m. for frequent feedings, diapers changing or just wanting to play. Arrgghh!
That first baby is growing up and the family has a routine. Perhaps the sleepless nights are a vague memory. The second miracle comes along or maybe more. Finding sleep just gets more complicated.
When they start a family, many new parents come to appreciate their own parents, and the new grandmothers are usually eager to help out. But lots of issues can leave new parents without any support.
When asked about the benefits of sleep for new moms, Dr. Bill Simpson of Columbus OB-GYN replied, “The happiest new moms that I see are the ones who have live-in help.” However, many new moms are not afforded such a luxury and find the words “sleep deprivation”part of their vocabulary.
A newer concept in theValley area is to hire someone to watch your baby during night hours. Two local women offer such a service called Night-time Nannies. Beverly Thurmond and Susan Holland worked together in the obstetrics office of Dr. Serena Tidwell. The two had talked about sitting for new babies, but it was more pie in the sky than reality. “Until one day when a patient called the office looking to see if we knew of anyone who would watch a baby at night,”saidThurmond. “That is when light bulbs started going off.” That was in April of 2005 and they have been night sitting for new borns ever since.
“For about the first year we did alot of interviews. It is by word of mouth that people heard about us. Then we just started getting calls telling us what nights and what times they wanted us,” said Thurmond. “Basically the parents are trying to get some sleep. We stay with the baby in their room and get up with them during the night. Some parents want us to bottle feed them while they sleep, and some want us to change them and bring them to the mom to nurse.”
Typically the nannies arrive at the home at 9pm and stay until 6am Many parents will use the nanny service for date nights or weekend trips.
Jenn Agnew, mom of two young boys, discovered the night nanny service after having her second son. “They were a lifesaver. We were literally at a breaking point. We only used Beverly a few times but it was so helpful,”Agnew said. “When I had the first baby, I slept when he slept. But with a toddler running around all day and having to wake up all night with the new baby, we were exhausted.”
The Agnews chose to use the service on Wednesday nights. “We felt if we could get over the hump and re-energize that one night, we could make it to the weekend.”
Thurmond remarked,“Some parents tell us that we are addictive. They have more energy during the day and are able to do what they need to do. I know that I couldn’t have gotten through having my children without the help of my mother and sister. Even once the babies start sleeping through the night, they often call us back for a weekend or something.”
Each family has different needs. Some want someone at the house to watch a baby while they get older siblings ready and dropped off for school. “I still work full time during the day,” said Thurmond. “Susan is able to fill in for the parents looking for special needs during the day.”
“The children are good for us. We haven’t had any problems. Most of them are excited to see us,” she said. “Actually one family just had twins and we are going to see them soon. It is so fun to see how they have grown and changed.”
Thurmond and Holland stay busy. “With the two of us everything has fallen into place. It [the work] does come and go but we’re busy right now. We have a new baby supposed to be born in March. I love it.”
Don’t keep it a secret. Tell everyone you are looking for sleep. Sleep before the baby comes, in the hospital and when you return home. Sleep is a key process for proper healing. Dr. Simpson said, “The benefits of sleep—more energy and clearer mind—make you a better mother.”Sleep whenever you can. And more importantly, feel no guilt. Sleep does everyone good.
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